I am a newbie with blogging but i just want to share my life. I don't even know how to give the details but...just writing anything i have in my heart.
I am a licensed pastor of a pentecostal denomination in the Philippines. During my life in the Bible school, I had a lot of questions on how to know God's will regarding love, courtship and marriage. Opinions from teachers, friends, and mentors has one perspective which is composed of these three: family's blessing, church family blessing and the blessing of the partner. And of course as a teenager I'm very excited to experience these signs and find God's will for my life. Throughout my preaching, seminars and bible studies with the youth, I always taught about God's will--and of course the young people would tend to write lot's of question about WHY, WHEN, HOW, and WHERE to find the will of God.
exactly 15days ago, the questions of the young people is now my personal question about the partner God have in stored for me. i started to ask these when my girlfriend dumped me saying, "1 year I waited but you failed me from my expectations". up to this time, i can't help but to shed tears when i remember the moments of my life with her. I'm always stuck being broken every time i remember her reason of dumping. I'm being drawn to hating my self when I THINK I DID WHAT IS RIGHT for our relationship.
Here are my questions that I'm working out for its answer:
1. is it wrong to protect her from being overworked and underpaid by her company?
2. is it wrong to be insistent in terms of decision making?
3. is it wrong if she will take the initiative of texting/calling me when I'm busy working for the church?
4. is it wrong that I'm not rich?
5. is it wrong that I loved her more than she did?
6. is it wrong when I loved to play computer games? (e.g. DOTA)
7. Is it wrong when I am not as productive as she does?
if you read my blog and have the answer to my questions, please do help me.
i feel realy worthless when she's gone. I want her back but i don't know what to do.
